I have started and dropped this blog more times than I can count.
And I’ve probably thought about picking it back up at least three times a week for the past two years.
But something has always stopped me.
I wasn’t ready, and I wasn’t sure why.
But now I know.
Now I know that in order for me to write again, I have to get real.
Let me rewind…
I started reading blogs probably 8 years ago. I saw all of these women; moms, wives, college students – and they had these gorgeous blogs with these immaculate homes and these adorable, angel children and they had everything so dang perfect. And in the back of my mind, I always thought that maybe when I had kids, that would be a good outlet for me.
A way to stay home with babies, bring in a little extra dough, and still have a passion that could be just mine.
Then I became a wife. And a mom. And a homeowner. And an adult.
And my blog wasn’t professionally designed. And my house wasn’t immaculate. And my children weren’t angels. And I sure as heck didn’t have everything perfectly put together.
I spend my days in pajamas and my bathrobe.
My hair is always in a pony tail, and I only wear makeup for weddings or when I want something from my husband.
My kitchen sink is always full.
My laundry is always folded and never put away.
My house almost always looks like this.
Dinner never gets cooked before 6PM.
I yell at my kids when I’m cranky.
I only shower if I’m planning on leaving the house.
And sometimes my basement smells like cat crap because I’m too lazy to empty the litter box.
And because of that, I didn’t feel worthy.
Worthy enough for someone to peek into my life. Worthy enough to share my heart. Worthy enough to provide advice or ideas. Worthy enough to be successful at something in which I was failing.
So, I quit.
And then, this week I had a lightbulb moment while I was pooping. Yep. Pooping.
None of that was ever really me.
I was trying to have a perfect home and a perfect life and two perfect children. But I didn’t have any of that. And it was so dang exhausting trying to accomplish those things for a bunch of cyber strangers.
I don’t want to impress anyone that isn’t already impressed with me the way I am.
I don’t want to give advice to someone that doesn’t like the way I do things.
I don’t want to share life with people that don’t like my life.
And I definitely don’t want to hand out an artificial, cookie-cutter, plastic version of someone I wish I could be.
So, if you think I’m cool – you should read my blog.
If you like my house – you should read my blog.
If you think my children are cute – you should read my blog.
If your idea of ‘perfect’ is a life full of happy and sad days, clean and dirty days, fun-filled and lazy days, board game days and electronics days, kind-mom days and Godzilla-mom days and everything else you probably feel you’re the only one that does when no one else is looking – well, this might just be the blog that you should read.
And if that’s not what you’re looking for. I’m alright with that too.
I’m no longer willing to sacrifice myself just to please someone else.
I’m ready to be me.
And I’m ready to be happy with me!
If you want to join me, then follow me along this journey.
One day I might talk about mom stuff. The next day it could be kid stuff. On occasion, I’ll show you some of the crafts or home DIY projects I’m working on. And other days I’ll talk about one of my passions like health, education or God. And some days, probably more often than not, I will talk about pooping.
Welcome to my real life and welcome to my home!
I can’t wait to show you!
Psych! That’s not my house.